Friday, March 26, 2010

Man do I struggle with yearning and longing for Him lately! I don't quite understand how this happens, but it DOES. I have prayed in the past, and this was also prayed over me when I was baptized, that outside of His presence I would be miserable.
Praise the Lord because it is SO true. When I do not purposefully enter into time with Him, and have constant communion with Him throughout the day, I am a MESS. The "funny" thing is, when this is happening, I never seem to realize it as being the reason I'm feeling so down!
Take yesterday for example:
I got up kind of late, took Brian his lunch, drove around aimlessly for awhile (with hopes of finding some random ice cream shop along the way--which I did, but it was :( clooosed!) Then I just came home feeling very down as I hadn't even showered yet, it was raining and I just plain didn't have any drive in me to do anything. So.. I sat on my butt and surfed the web for awhile. A long while. Bored and sad, I started to think maybe my hormones were to blame for my sluggishness and not caring about anything type of mood. I was miserable. DUH. Helloo?!? Anybody home? Of course you're miserable- you ASKED to be miserable outside of Him.. duurrrr da duurrrr!
At this point I realized it was 5:15, and my lovely sister in law was coming over between 5:30-5:45 for a haircut. SO I hurried and got a shower, and cut her hair. She paid me with a new toaster since mine got infested with ants and I threw it away earlier this week. :) Then I made some dinner for me and the hubbsy. The rest of the evening I made it a point to immerse myself in prayer as we went about our evening. WHAT a difference. Sheesh. If you are going to pray this prayer of being miserable outside of his presence.. mean what you say, and realize when you are miserable that this is most likely the reason why! It is meant to help keep your eyes focused on Him and to find joy in Him before anything else. I tried cheering myself up with the fact that there's a beautiful baby growing inside of me-- but without the joy of the Lord's presence, even the miracle of this little baby was not enough to be my joy. Granted, it made me smile, but that deep inner joy was not even stirred. The things you have to be thankful for- would not be there without Him. Plain and simple "ALL good things come from God." The joy that comes with them is included in that ;)

TODAY.. I woke up and made some muffins and lunch for my dear, sent him on his way, made some tea for me and baby snuggled up on the couch and spent some REAL time with the Lord. Ahhh.. what a difference! I would be so depressed without him in my daily life!
I turned on some "Shane and Shane" on Pandora, and the song Yearn came on. I'll put it on the music player so you can hear it :)
The lyrics and scripture references that I found on are here, as well.
PS- I promise I'll upload the pics.. It is on my list of things to do-- that list is large today since I was such a bummm yesterday! Sorry :P


by shane barnard

holy design
this place in time
that i might seek and find my God
my God

Lord i want to yearn for You
i want to burn with passion
over You and only You
Lord i want to yearn

Your joy is mine
yet why am i fine
with all my singing and bringing grain
in light of Him

oh You give life and breath
through Him You give all things
in Him we live and move
that's why i sing

This next passage is spoken through Paul in Athens while describing the one true God to the Athenians and some foreigners, as they had been serving what they called "an unknown God" as inscribed in the altar they had created; Acts 17:25-28:

"And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us. For in him we live and move and have our being. As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'"

Hebrews 12:28-29:
"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe for our "God is a consuming fire.""
(vs. 29 is also referenced in Deuteronomy 4:24)

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